For my readers going through the transition process… bodily themselves or as a partner/family member:
If you (or your partner/family member) have chosen to move to the “other” gender and are now out of the androgynous zone how is this impacting your sense of self? For me, I’m no longer perceived as a lesbian. I’m now a “straight guy” and, unless I go out of my way to delve into my history, that’s just the way it is. Resistance is futile.
And I’m struggling with it. I’m straight. But I’m not. I now have straight male privilege. But I don’t. I’m not intentionally stealth but, in most social situations, I am stealth.
Transitioning shows you just how fragile your sense of self is – the allusion (or delusion) of something concrete and immutable inside yourself just crumbles under the pressure of social interaction.
Do you find this disarming? Uncomfortable? If you do, what coping skills have you thrown at it? Do they work?
For me, I need grounding time. Alone, out of the spotlight, time to regenerate and reassure myself that I’m still me, whatever that is, and even though growth is painful it will work out for the best. This mostly works for me but not necessarily for those who live with me, care about me, or work with me – especially as a primary coping mechanism. I need to find other ways to cope besides isolation. Ideas?